剛剛MSN沒關...下樓燒個紙錢...

一回來~我妹就跟我說... "哥...剛剛有好幾個人傳來祝你生日快樂耶!!!

"接著我妹又說: "不過你在燒紙錢......所以~我都有幫你回他們唷!!! 但是...他們都下線了耶~

"我覺得很奇怪 就看了一下記錄. 結果......天才我老妹居然給我回 :

『對不起，我哥已經不在了... 除非我去幫他燒紙錢，不然他沒有辦法 從下面上來跟你們說話......』

Translate:

Did not sign off MSN before going downstairs to burn insence paper...
Once i'm back,my sis told me..."Bro,there were some ppl wishing u happy birthday on msn!"
Next,she told me,"But u were burning insence paper,so i helped u reply them...And now,they signed off..."
I thought that it was weird...so i check my records...
My 'genius' sister actually replied'
"Sorry,my brother is no longer here...unless i burn insence paper for him,he is unable to come up to talk to u..."



Ben invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful Ben's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between Ben and his roommate and this only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Ben and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Ben volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Allison and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Allison came to Ben and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. "You don't suppose she took it, do you?

"Ben said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, Ben received a letter from his mother which read:

"Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Allison, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Allison. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"

Lessons in Logic

I was born intelligent -
Education ruined me
................................................... ............

Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
So why practice?
.................................................. ...............

If it's true that we are here to help others,
Then what exactly are the others here for?
.................................................. ............

Since light travels faster than sound,
People appear bright until you hear them speak
................................................... ..........

How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
.................................................. ...............

Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa
................................................... ............

If your father is a poor man,
It is your fate but,
If your father-in-law is a poor man,
It's your stupidity
................................................... .......

Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two women
................................................... ..........

Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing inLife
................................................... .....

The wise never marry.
And when they marry they become otherwise.
.................................................. ......

Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives
................................................... ......
Never put off the work till tomorrow
What you can put off today.
.................................................. ...............

"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
.................................................. ...........

There should be a better way to start a day
Then waking up every morning
.................................................. .........

"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk
.................................................. ..........

"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours
.................................................. ...........

God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends
................................................... ........

The more you learn,
the more you know,
The more you know,
the more you forget
The more you forget,
the less you know
So..
Why learn
................................................... ......

A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk,
I have a work station....
What more can I say........

Over Enthu:


An enthusiastic door-to-door vacuum salesman goes to the first house in his new territory. He knocks, a real mean and tough looking lady opens the door, and before she has a chance to say anything, he runs inside and dumps cow patties all over the carpet.
He says, "Lady, if this vacuum cleaner don't do wonders cleaning this up, I'll eat every chunk of it."
She turns to him with a smirk and says, "You want ketchup on that?"
The salesman says, "Why do you ask?"
She says, "We just moved in and we haven't got the electricity turned on yet."



Went to the Herb Garden @ Bishan Park 2 today...
Hot sia today...
Walk there from home...
Took me 40mins ...
tiring work...
But we hav chosen wat we wan to plant in sch...
After finish work in herb garden...
Went to AVT...
The homebase of The Azures...
Saw quite a few duelists...
At the near end when i was going home...
Daren came...
Played With him...
Went home at ard 5...
After that...
Went to Cut Hair...

A young woman, several months pregnant, boarded a bus and sat opposite a young man, he smiled, and feeling embarrassed she changed her seat. But it was to no avail, for the young man smiled even more broadly when she sat down. Again she moved to another seat, he grinned and again after the fourth move, the young man just rolled up and roared with laughter. The woman complained and duly summoned him.

Judge: Well, young man, have you anything to say in your defense against this charge?

The young man: Well, your Honor, when the young lady entered the bus, her condition was obvious. However, that did not prompt my smile, but she sat under an advertisement that read: "Coming shortly - The Gold Rush Twins." The lady seemed indignant when I smiled and she got up and took another seat beneath a shaving stick advertisement, which read:"William's stick did the trick." She moved a third time and sat beneath a poster that read: "Sloane's liniments will remove swelling." It was after she had moved her seat fourth time that I lost control of my merriment for the above was a slogan: "Dunlop Rubber Goods would have prevented this accident."

Psychotherapist

A psychotherapist was having a roaring business since he started from scratch. So much so that he could now afford to have a proper shop banner advertising his wares. So he told a kid to paint the sign board for him & put it above his shop entrance.

But, instead of his business building up, it began to slacken. He had especially noticed the ladies shying away from his shop after reading the sign board. So he decided to check it out himself. Then he understood why !

The boy found a small wooden board so he had split the word into the 3 words :
Psycho-
the-
rapist.

Top ten Pick up lines~~~

#10 Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
#9 Are you an interior decorator? When I saw you the room became beautiful.
#8 Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
#7 I was blinded by your beauty so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
#6 You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
#5 Giant polar bear (What?) It's an icebreaker. Hi, my name is....
#4 Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
#3 I'm invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
#2 Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it's just a sparkle.
#1 You say "I bet you $20 I can kiss you without using my lips." She says, "Bet's on." You kiss her then say, "I lost."

Funny Insults...Not made by me!!!

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!
* Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the hell happen to you?
* Right now I'm sitting here looking at you trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.
* A pretty girl can kiss a guy* a bird can kiss a butterfly* the rising sun can kiss the grass* but you my friend!! yes you!! YOU CAN KISS MY AS*********
If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes.....then why do you wear a bra??!
* mirrors don't talk but lucky for you %n they don't laugh
* Poof be gone, your breath is too strong, I don't wanna be mean, but you need listerine, not a sip, not a swallow, but the whole friggin bottle
* People like you are the reason I'm on medication.
* Don't piss me off today, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies
* I have always woundered why people bang their heads against brick walls..... then I met you. Don't bother leaving a message.
* Don't let your mind wander. It's way to small to be outside by itself!
*I had a nightmare. I dreamt I was you.
* Hey, Remember that time I told you I thought you were cool? I LIED.
* I need you...........I want you............To get out of my face
* Damn not you again.......
* Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you abuse the privilege.
* If I wanted to talk to you, I would have called you first.
* I am not anti-social..I just don't like you
* If you're gonna act like a dick you should wear a condom on your head so you can at least look like one !!!
* Hmm...I dont know what your probelm is...but I'm going to bet it's really hard to pronounce...
* There are some stupid people in this world. You just helped me realize it.
* Until you called me I couldn't remember the last time I wanted somebody's fingers to break so badly.
* If you ran 1,000,000 miles to see the boy/girl of your dreams, what would you say when you got there?
*Wow, you looked a lot hotter from a distance!
* Cancel my subscriptions ... I'm tired of your issues.
* I may be fat,but you're ugly,and I can diet!!!
* Earth is full. Go home.
* If I could be one person for a day, it sure as hell wouldn't be you.
* Hey, heres a hint. If i don't answer you the first 25 times, what makes you think the next 25 will work?
* How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Leave a message and I'll get back to you...
* Oh dear! Looks like you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!
* What's that ugly thing growing out of your neck... Oh... It's your head...
* I'm sorry, Talking to you seems as appealing as playing leapfrog with unicorns.
* Oh I'm sorry, how many times did your parents drop you when you were a baby?
* Don't hate me because I'm beautiful hate me because your boyfriend thinks so.
* God made mountains, god made trees, god made you but we all make mistakes.
* Remember JESUS loves you but everyone else thinks you're an idiot.
* I'm not mean ... you're just a sissy.
* Sorry I can't think of an insult stupid enough for you.
* Why don't you go outside and play, hide and go f*** yourself
* Beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone
* How about a little less questions and a little more shut the hell up? I'm away live with it.
* FOR THE LAST TIME! Your mother left here at 9 this morning... Leave me alone!
* Let's see, I've walked the dog, cleaned my room, gone shopping and gossiped with my friends...Nope, this list doesn't say that I'm required to talk to you.
* When you were born you were so ugly that instead of slapping you, the doctor slapped your mom! leave a message
* My Mom said never talk to strangers and well, since you're really strange.... I guess that means I can't talk to you!
* Forget the ugly stick! you must have been born in the ugly forrest!
* I really don't like you but if you really must leave a message, I'll be nice and at least pretend to care.
* You know the drill! You leave a message....and I ignore it!
* The Village just called. They said they were missing their town idiot, I couldn't really understand them, but I think they were saying the name was yours...
* I'm not here right now so cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT!!!
* Why are you bothering me? I have my away message on cause I don't want to listen to you and your stupid nonsense.
* You dont know me, you just wish you did.
* Hey- I am away from my computer but in the meantime, why don't you go play in traffic?!
* You have your whole life to be a jerk....so why dont you take a day off so.. leave me a message for when I get back!!!!

Saw this and found it funny...
Check it out!!
http://www.mrbrownshow.com/2009/03/30/the-mrbrown-show-army-fighting-language/

Lucky!!!
Managed to stay in Guardian rank...
Of all the 10 Guardians,
4 got stay in guardian rank...

Of course...
There will be ways to get back to become a guardian...
That is...
I forgot...
But there are sure to be ways...

Hope more guardians get to claim their guardian ranks back...
Hav to prepare for World Championship...

Azure Trial

Trial Of The Azures...
Will I still stay as a guardian or jus a member???
Waiting for results...